Canaries with Gray on Their Wings

“The Lord seeth not as man seeth; for man looketh on the outward appearance, but the Lord looketh on the heart.”

(1 Samuel 16:7)

This article I'm going to post is from the monthly publication of my church. It may seem contrary to what I have been saying - that we are, each of us, beautiful. But I have been thinking this weekend about how beauty is something holistic. It is neither just superficial nor is it just a matter of the heart. I used to think that when someone said that, "It's what's on the inside that counts", they were really saying, "Well, you're not very pretty, but you are a nice girl." That didn't really make me feel better. Like all women, I want to be beautiful. But I think this weekend I realized what they mean. Society's idea of beauty is constantly in flux. Random fashion elites decide what is "in" and what is "not", and lots and lots of people make lots and lots of money convincing women that they are never good enough until they buy this product. But real beauty is something much more stable than that. One girl who responded to my request for pictures sent me one of her, not in a moment when she felt well-primped, but in a moment when she felt triumphant, victorious, in a word - beautiful. This article I think hits on that idea - real, true beauty.

By Thomas S. Monson*:

"Nearly 60 years ago, while I was serving as a young bishop, Kathleen McKee, a widow in my ward, passed away. Among her things were three pet canaries. Two, with perfect yellow coloring, were to be given to her friends. The third, Billie, had yellow coloring marred by gray on his wings. Sister McKee had written in a note to me: 'Will you and your family make a home for him? He isn’t the prettiest, but his song is the best.'

"Sister McKee was much like her yellow canary with gray on its wings. She was not blessed with beauty, gifted with poise, or honored by posterity. Yet her song helped others to more willingly bear their burdens and more ably shoulder their tasks.

"The world is filled with yellow canaries with gray on their wings. The pity is that so precious few have learned to sing. Some are young people who don’t know who they are, what they can be or even want to be; all they want is to be somebody. Others are stooped with age, burdened with care, or filled with doubt—living lives far below the level of their capabilities.

"To live greatly, we must develop the capacity to face trouble with courage, disappointment with cheerfulness, and triumph with humility. You ask, “How might we achieve these goals?” I answer, “By gaining a true perspective of who we really are!” We are sons and daughters of a living God, in whose image we have been created. Think of that: created in the image of God. We cannot sincerely hold this conviction without experiencing a profound new sense of strength and power. [and beauty!!!]"

"To live greatly" - wouldn't that make you feel beautiful?

Amy (and Brennan)

Chelsea

~ With this picture, Chelsea said, "I guess most pregnant women just feel ugly and fat at this stage. Thinking back to that time, that's exactly how I flet, but looking at this picture now I feel like I can appreciate more how I looked by knowing that my beautiful (almost 5 year old) baby girl was growing inside of me."

Rachel (and a friend)

Diana

Kelsey

*Just a few notes for friends of other faiths. A bishop is a leader of a congregation (like a pastor) and Thomas Monson (the author) currently serves as the President of The Church of Jesus Christ, our prophet.

Defining beauty

Sariah (and Rachel)

I have been a little worried about starting this blog. I have been worried that I have had the wrong motivations (ie make people like me) for starting it. But in spite of that unfortunately valid concern, I knew this was something I needed. I want to thank those of you who have shared some of yourselves with me through pictures and stories. And I want to assure you that you are beautiful.

Some of you have asked if it's okay to follow the blog or suggest it to friends. I say, absolutely!! We need each other very much.

But on to today's topic - what is beauty? I think we could all really easily define the media's definition of beautiful... and exactly the ways in which we don't live up to it. Too tall, too short, too wide, too curvy, whatever. But I don't think that's actually "beauty". Now, I don't intend to define beauty completely today (can we really define it?), but I would like to get us all thinking. I hope that in our thinking we might start to include definitions that society does not. Why can't a short woman be beautiful? Or a tall one? Why not a curvy and round body? I mean, Ruben seemed to like them.

We'll start with more "internal" definitions and move our way into more "external" ones. I think you may find that there is room for you in all of these definitions.

From the song "Beautiful" by Cherie Call

"Look at all the signs, Look at all the shows

All the glamorous people who claim to know

What perfection is and what makes beauty stay

But when all the styles go out and the labels fade away

It's what you give that makes you beautiful

It's how you live that makes your dreams come true

Keep your faith in this world,

And let the light of the Lord shine through.

That's what makes you beautiful.

Nothing burns as bright, nothing shimmers so

As the smile of a friend when hope is running low

And how your hand feels warm when you dry a tear

Love is still in fashion at the end of every year."

Jenelle

Jeffery R. Holland in his talk "To Young Women", quoted a woman who "wrote something to the effect that in her years of working with beautiful women she had seen several things they all had in common... a glow of health, a warm personality, a love of learning, stability of character, and integrity."

Cherie

dictionary.com defines beauty as - "the quality present in a thing or person that gives intense pleasure or deep satisfaction to the mind, whether arising from sensory manifestations (shape, color, sound, etc.), a meaningful design or pattern, or something else (as a personality in which high spiritual qualities are manifest)"

On the website embodyingwomanhood.com, the January 2010 issue is devoted to beauty. In the article, "In Defense of Beauty" by Elizabeth, she writes, "I believe that when women view beauty as a gift from God, it is something less intimidating, less of an unattainable endowment preserved for a fortunate few." She also quotes Elaine Scarry's "On Beauty":

“Beauty brings copies of itself into being. It makes us draw it, take photographs of it, or describe it to other people….Beauty, as both Plato’s Symposium and everyday life confirm, prompts the begetting of children: when the eye sees someone beautiful, the whole body wants to reproduce the person. But it also – as Diotima tells Socrates – prompts the begetting of poems and laws, the works of Homer, Hesiod, and Lycurgus. The poem and the law may then prompt descriptions of themselves, — literary and legal commentaries — that seek to make the beauty of the prior thing more evident, to make, in other words, the poem’s of law’s ‘clear descernibility’ even more ‘clearly discernable.’

“[B]eauty is lifesaving. Homer is not alone in seeing beauty as lifesaving. Augustine described it as ‘a plank amid the waves of the sea.’ Proust makes a version of this claim over and over again. Beauty quickens. It adrenalizes. It makes the heart beat faster. It makes life more vivid, animated, living, worth living…”

Mary

Please leave your comments about how you define beauty - I truly would like to learn from you. I think as we begin to see through each other's eyes, we expand ourselves, and we find that there is a lot more beauty to go around.

Kelsey (and Brent)